40 funny and inspirational quotes about retirement

Last reviewed 24^th October 2024
5 min read

Retirement is a time of great change – the start of a new chapter in your life. As you get closer to it, you may find yourself having conversations with friends, family and colleagues about retiring and growing older – with lots of funny and inspirational comments.

Perhaps you know somebody who’s reaching retirement age. They can often find such a large lifestyle change overwhelming and need support to navigate their new situation. One of the best ways to do this is with some nice quotes about retirement.

Whether it’s for a retirement card, goodbye letter or even just trying to make your friend laugh, throwing in a short retirement quote can carry a lot of meaning. We’ve compiled 40 funny and inspiring retirement quotes below that may help to boost spirits and nurture a positive attitude about the new adventure that lies ahead.

Funny quotes about retirement

Retirement is something many people joke about long before they can actually do it. Below are 10 funny retirement quotes to start laughing with:

1. "What do you call someone who's happy on Mondays? Retired!" ~ Unknown
2. “The company gave me an aptitude test and I found out the work I was best suited for was retirement.” ~ Unknown
3. “When a man retires, his wife gets twice as much husband for half as much money.” ~ Chi Chi Rodriguez
4. “You have to put off being young until you can retire.” ~ Unknown
5. “There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working.” ~ Rober Half
6. “In your retirement years never drink coffee at lunch; it will keep you awake in the afternoon.” ~ Unknown
7. “Retirement is not in my vocabulary. They aren’t going to get rid of me that way.” ~ Betty White
8. “I’m not just retiring from the company, I’m also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron.” ~ Hartman Jule
9. "Retirement: that's when you return from work one day and say ‘hi honey, I'm home – forever’.” ~ Gene Perret
10. “Some of the best memories are made in flip flops.” ~ Kellie Elmore

Inspirational quotes about retirement

Large milestones such as retirement can often cause people to reflect on both the past and the future. Below are 10 inspirational retirement quotes that may give a friend, or yourself, optimism and excitement beginning a new chapter in life:

1. “Often when you think you’re at the end of something, you’re at the beginning of something else.” ~ Fred Rogers
2. “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” ~ C. S. Lewis
3. “Planning to retire? Before you do, find your hidden passion – do the thing that you have always wanted to do.” ~ Catherine Pulsifer
4. “It's time to say goodbye, but I think goodbyes are sad, and I'd much rather say hello. Hello to a new adventure.” ~ Ernie Harwell
5. “Don't cry because it's over – smile because it happened.” ~ Dr. Seuss
6. “Retirement is a blank sheet of paper. It is a chance to redesign your life into something new and different.” ~ Patrick Foley
7. “Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
8. “Don't simply retire from something; have something to retire to.” ~ Harry Emerson Fosdick
9. “What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.” ~ T. S. Eliot
10. “Retirement is when you stop living at work and start working at living.” ~ Unknown

Quotes about growing older together

Growing older with someone you love can be one of life’s most rewarding experiences. Below are 10 quotes for expressing your feelings towards those closest to you:

1. “I hope we’ll get lucky enough to grow old together.” ~ Paula Mclain
2. “The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” ~ Audrey Hepburn
3. “Happiness in marriage is a moment by moment choice. A decision to love, forgive, grow and grow old together.” ~ Fawn Weaver
4. “The love we have in our youth is superficial compared to the love an old man has for his old wife.” ~ Will Durant
5. “Relish love in your old age. Aged love is like aged wine; it becomes more satisfying, more refreshing, more valuable, more appreciated and more intoxicating!” ~ Leo Buscaglia
6. “The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It’s a choice you make – not just on your wedding day, but over and over again – and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife.” ~ Barbara de Angelis
7. “Mature love is not caught up in fantasy. It is willing to see someone for who they are and choosing to love them fully.” ~ Thema Davis
8. “I love it when I see old couples together because it makes me believe that true love does exist.” ~ Unknown
9. “It is love in old age, no longer blind, that is true love. For the love’s highest intensity doesn’t necessarily mean its highest quality.” ~ Booth Tarkington
10. “As we grow older together, as we continue to change with age, there is one thing that will never change: I will always keep falling in love with you.” ~ Karen Clodfelder

Simple quotes about later life

Depending on the situation, an inspirational message or a funny punchline might not quite fit the tone. Below are 10 simple and short quotes that celebrate later life:

1. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” ~ Mark Twain
2. “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” ~ C.S. Lewis
3. “In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.” ~ Abraham Lincoln
4. “One day you will look back and see that all along you were blooming.” ~ Morgan Harper Nichols
5. “Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.” ~ Franz Kafka
6. “You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.” ~ George Burns
7. “Age is simply the number of years the world has been enjoying you.” ~ Unknown
8. “We are always the same age inside.” ~ Gertrude Stein
9. “Getting old is like climbing a mountain; you get a little out of breath, but the view is much better.” ~ Ingrid Bergman
10. “Why not just embrace it, go along with it and welcome it?” ~ Helen Mirren

Next steps

Hopefully these quotes have given you a laugh or maybe some food for thought. If you’re looking for more ideas about life before and after retirement, why not check out some of our other articles:

• How to have a happy retirement
• Retirement hobbies for better mental health
• Memorable 60th birthday party ideas